Can experiencing divorce make children stronger?

On behalf of Stange Law Firm, PC posted in Child Custody on Friday, March 11, 2016.

It is common for unhappily married people to hold off on getting divorced because of their children. They worry that the trauma of their parents splitting up would harm the kids emotionally, leading to years of psychological damage that will require hours and hours of therapy to work through.

While divorce can be tough for the children, in most cases it is still the right decision in the long run. Living in a house with constant arguments, resentment and tension is not a healthy environment for kids. As long as the divorcing parents continue to provide stability and emotional support, their children should eventually come to terms with the new reality.

In an article in The Washington Post, a woman argued that her parents’ divorce not only did not harm her, it “had some surprising benefits,” despite the fact that her living situation was no better afterward. Her mother quickly remarried a man with two children of his own. The mother and stepfather fought just as much as the mother did with her ex-husband, and the blended siblings were all “young, angry and scared,” the woman recalls.

Still, she says the experience made her more mature, independent and tough as an 11-year-old girl. As an adult, she credits her parents’ divorce for her own strong marriage and her strong parenting skills.

Every child is unique, and there is no “wrong” way for a girl or boy to feel about their parents’ divorce. Still, parents should not feel they are struck in a bad marriage for their children’s sake. With the right divorce attorney, the process can be as smooth and free of rancor as possible.

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